


Someone Who Reminds Her of Home

by bilgegungoren00



Series: A Boy from Daxam and a Girl from Krypton (KaraMel) [28]
Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Confession, Fluff, Reflection, post 2x13, post couch scene
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-24
Updated: 2017-02-24
Packaged: 2018-09-26 17:44:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,439
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9913871
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bilgegungoren00/pseuds/bilgegungoren00
Summary: My take on what might happen post-couch/kiss scene in Supergirl 2x13.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! 
> 
> Guess who wrote another fanfiction that was supposed to be like around 1000 words and ended up being 3500 word, and finished it in like two days? Yep, I seem to be unable to stop writing. Or you can also thank my geography teacher, who makes the lesson so boring and incomprehensible that I end up writing on my computer. ANYWAY, so, this kind of steered off where I wanted to go with this, which was basically pure fluff and happiness, but I couldn't get the image of Mon-El from my head after Kara told her that she and Mxy would make a great team, standing in the bathroom in the DEO, looking in the mirror as tears ran down his cheeks (IT HURTS Y'ALL. IT HURTS.). And, well, starting from there the road I took kind of changed, but I'm still pretty happy about it! I hope you like it as well.
> 
> P.s. It's like 1:30 in the night here, so I didn't have time to check for mistakes. If there are some, please excuse me!

Mon-El planned on waking up before Kara, getting out of the bed to make a breakfast for her—assuming he could pull off cooking, of course—and surprising her with it before she went to work. He really did, and he even thought about whether he should do pancakes and bacon, or eggs. He knew Kara loved pancakes, but if she didn’t have premade batter then he wasn’t sure if he could pull it off. Eggs were hard, and he burned a ton of them while Kara tried to teach him how to cook, but it was slightly easier than making the pancake batter.

That was what he thought the previous night, as he fell asleep next to Kara on the bed. And he did wake up early, not that he didn’t, but… He seemed unable to pull himself out of bed. He was…

He was entranced Kara’s beauty.

That wasn’t exactly his fault. How could he have known that there would be a slit between the curtains that would let the sun in? How could he have known that those rays of sunlight would illuminate Kara’s hair in just the right way, making it seem like liquid gold was dripping down her face? How could he have known that Kara would curl herself around the blanket and hold it like it was her favorite… What did they call it here? Stuffed animal?

And exactly how could he have known that Kara’s lips, her pink, full and slightly parted lips would be so inviting? Or her rosy cheeks would be so kissable? He’d never woken up next to a girl in his entire life, not even on Daxam. _Especially_ not on Daxam. All the girls he’d been with there… They weren’t serious. “One-night stands,” as Winn might’ve called them. Mon-El never felt inclined to stay with them after they were done. But Kara… She was different. She wasn’t like any other girls; you couldn’t just hook up with a girl like that as a one-night stand. Not only that she would kick your ass to the next life if you tried that, she was also worth much, much more than that.

She wasn’t the only one that was different, though. Mon-El was different as well. He wasn’t that arrogant, selfish person that he’d been on Daxam. Maybe he never really _was_ that person to begin with. It was just that… On Daxam, it was easier to ignore things rather than fight them head on. So he’d ignored everything. He’d ignored every rule and law that didn’t match with his beliefs, he’d ignored the people that got hurt because of those laws, he ignored the pain of the innocents instead of… Instead of doing something about it. He wouldn’t have survived going against the King. And, along with that… He’d ignored his feelings as well. Whenever he felt like something had the potential to get serious, he ran away. Moved on to someone else. He forced himself to see women as nothing more than…as a means to have sex, because it was easier than getting attached. Getting attached meant feelings, and feelings could easily end up in pain.

That didn’t work anymore. It _couldn’t_ work. Not only he’d come to realize that the person he’d been on Daxam was nothing more than a mask to avoid pain, but also he knew if he continued being that person… He’d lose Kara. She’d never be with someone like that; both he and she knew the Kryptonian deserved better. She’d leave him, and he’d already experienced what it felt like once, when Kara decided to marry Mxyzptlk. The memory still rolled around in his mind, as if it was permanently branded there. The desperation he felt, the pain, the helplessness, realizing that… That he wasn’t enough for Kara. He could never be enough for Kara.

He’d been jealous of Mxy. He’d told Kara that much. He was jealous that the imp could give Kara everything she wanted, and he couldn’t. What he didn’t tell her was that it seemed like… It seemed like whenever he tried to give her everything, _be_ everything for her, it backfired. He’d tried to be her partner, and he messed up their first mission together. He told her about his feelings only to get rejected. And eventually, just when he learned that Kara might be returning his feelings and they could be together, Mxy showed up and offered her everything he didn’t have. It was as if the universe was telling them that they didn’t belong together.

He wanted to deny that. He didn’t want to accept that they simply wouldn’t work. That was why he went after Mxy. He wanted to get rid of him, stop him from getting between Kara and him. But… But he also wanted to prove that he was stronger than Mxy, that he could beat him, that despite all his magical powers he wasn’t indestructible. He wanted to be _better_ than Mxy.

It blew up in his face, fast, when Kara decided to marry the imp. It struck Mon-El hard, and not just because he couldn’t be in a relationship with Kara. He’d accepted before that she didn’t have feelings for him, he could do it again even if it would hurt. What was most painful was that Kara’s marriage wouldn’t only mean he would lose her as a girlfriend. It would also mean he’d lose her as a partner. Mxy would replace him. _He has limitless power that he can use to help me fight for justice_ , she’d told Mon-El. _We'll make a great team_.

He didn’t know what to do then. It hurt more than he imagined it could. Knowing that even though he gave her everything he had in him, every last piece of his strength and soul, it would still not match up with what Mxy could do. _I thought we were going to do that_ , was all he could say as tears built up in his eyes, in his throat. He couldn’t speak more, despite wanting to say that that was all he ever wanted. For him and Kara to be a team. A superhero team. He thought _they_ would be a great team with their superpowers and of course Kara’s experience.

It took all his strength to keep the tears from rolling down his cheeks. It only worked until he got out of the house, and even as he ran to the DEO his tears started were wetting his face. He remembered going into the bathroom of his makeshift room, staring at himself in the mirror as he watched the tears falling down. He saw people crying before, of course, yet he’d never cried himself, not since he became a teenager. It felt horrible. _He_ felt horrible, for ruining everything.

That was when he punched the mirror on the wall, not being able to stand his reflection anymore. The mirror shattered, the pieces flying around the bathroom as his hand had almost been embedded into the wall. And it _didn’t hurt_. That was the worst part. He wanted it to hurt, he wanted _something_ to distract him from the pain in his chest, yet he was invincible. And it wasn’t like he could ask someone for some lead.

The whole thing turned out to be not true in the end. Everything Kara said. Well, _almost_ everything. She’d been probably right about the ego thing, and Mon-El knew he needed to work on that. And he would. For Kara. For himself.

He reached up slowly to Kara’s face, pushing back a strand of her hair that had fallen on her eyes. A little smile pulled the Kryptonian’s lips, indicating that she wasn’t asleep. not anymore at least. She still hadn’t opened her eyes though.

“You’re staring,” she murmured, snuggling to Mon-El’s chest. The Daxamite found himself chuckling slightly as he stroked Kara’s hair…again.

“Am I not allowed to do that?” he inquired, raising his brows. Kara opened her eyes—just one eye, really, looking at him through a thin slit. He grinned at her.

“I didn’t say that.” This time, she really opened her eyes. And there they were, the comets, shining bright blue like the Earth’s sky with the sun hitting Kara’s face. “Did I?” Mon-El shook his head.

“Nope. You didn’t.” Mon-El’s fingers traveled down Kara’s hair to her bare shoulder, lightly rubbing it. He stared at his hand for a while before lifting his eyes to look at her lips, and then her eyes. There was a small smile on her face as she also took him in. She raised her hand to cradle his neck, and then caressed his hair. It was such an affectionate gesture, paired with such love that filled her eyes that Mon-El… He couldn’t believe how lucky he’d been. To land on Earth out of all planets in the whole universe. To land in National City, where Kara found her. And… And somehow this beautiful woman had chosen to be with him out of all people. He couldn’t even express how grateful he was about the turn of events.

“You’re beautiful,” he whispered, not being able to help himself. Kara’s smile widened.

“I think you told me that before,” she chuckled, leaning forward. There were merely inches between them.

“Yeah, that hasn’t changed since last time.” He flashed a smile at her before continuing. “How are you feeling?” he checked. Had to check. “About last night…” Her eyes went down to Kara’s body, covered with the blanket, yet he knew she was naked underneath. Just as he was. The previous night… He was ready to stop. To not rush things, take it slow, if that had been what Kara wanted. But then Kara’s hands went to his shirt buttons, and then her own sweater was off, and then their pants found their place on the floor, and things progressed from there. It was… Amazing. Indescribably amazing. It was better than any sex he’d had with anyone. Well, granted, he never felt anything like his feelings for Kara towards anyone, but he never knew… He never knew how love could add so much meaning to something that had merely been about pleasure for him. It was totally different with Kara, in a way… In a way that made him want to savor that feeling, to keep it inside his chest and never let it go. He wanted Kara. Now. Always. Only her.

He just hoped that Kara felt the same way.

“It was amazing,” Kara said without any hesitation in her voice. She put her hand on Mon-El’s chest, tracing the lines up his shoulder and neck until she cupped his cheek.

“You don’t… You don’t regret it, right?” he couldn’t help asking, forcing a smile. “Because I don’t want you to have questions—“

“Mon-El,” Kara stopped him, pressing a finger on his lips. “I don’t regret it. I wouldn’t have taken it this far if I didn’t want it.” Mon-El let the breath go he hadn’t even realized her was holding.

“Good,” he whispered, looking at Kara’s shoulder. “Because I didn’t want you to feel like you shouldn’t have done it. I want you to be happy.” Frowning, Kara shook her head.

“Mon-El, I _am_ happy. With you. Why do you doubt that?” Mon-El tried to shrug nonchalantly as if the answer wasn’t important at all. It was important, though.

“I just feel like… I mean, there are-there are other guys you could’ve been. You know, probably… Probably better than me.” He huffed with a soft chuckle. “Who probably would not be possessive and jealous over you and trust you.” Kara rolled her eyes with his answer.

“That’s correct,” she agreed, closing the distance between them and looking up. Two inches. There were two inches between their lips, and Kara’s legs were brushing his as her hand traveled down his neck to his back. It was hard to think, to hear her words and process them, but he forced himself. “There are many guys that I could be with. But you’re the one I want.” She took a deep breath, her fingers drawing circles on his bare back. “You offer me something that no one else on Earth can offer.”

“And what’s that?” Mon-El asked breathlessly, his eyes flickering from her lips to her eyes, and then back to her lips. He wanted to kiss her. Badly. Yet he also wanted to hear what she would say. What was it that he could offer her that no one else could? He couldn’t think of anything.

“Understanding.” She flashed a smile at him. “You understand what it feels like to lose a whole world. Clark lost Krypton too, but he was a baby. He doesn’t remember. You do. And I know… I know I have amazing family and friends here, but it isn’t the same. With you, it feels less…lonely.” With her words, Mon-El remembered what he’d seen weeks ago, when they first let him out of his cell. Kara was talking to her mother. The hologram of her mother. She told him that when she did that, she felt less lonely. And he understood. Talking to Kara, having someone that knew what he was going through… Maybe that was what made him able to move on, able to not _forget_ maybe but come to terms with losing his planet. It was understandable that Kara might be feeling the same. “Also, it just adds to it that I don’t have to worry about hurting you whenever I touch you. I can let go.” A grin pulled Mon-El’s lips, a genuine smile.

“Well, happy to help.” Wrapping his arm around Kara’s chest, he pulled her close, pressing his lips on hers. Kara returned his kiss, and yeah, Mon-El could definitely feel that she wasn’t holding back. She didn’t have to hold back. She knew… She knew that he wouldn’t break, not if she somehow slipped away and lost her control over her powers, not if she accidentally hit him too hard when they were joking, not if she hugged him tightly when she needed a tight hug…

That was the moment Mon-El truly realized how much Kara had been holding back, all those years. Last night, he’d thought maybe she’d held him a bit too tightly, maybe her kiss was a bit too harsh, but he wrote it off as passion. It wasn’t just that, though. Kara had probably gotten used to holding back so much that she hadn’t realized she didn’t need to hold back with him. All this time she probably was doing that unintentionally. Until last night, until she realized that Mon-El was almost as strong and almost as invincible as her, and that there was no risk of hurting _him_.

After their lips parted, leaving Mon-El breathless, Kara didn’t go far away. Instead, she rested his head on Mon-El’s chest, her hair sprawled over his chest and his shoulder. It slightly tinkled, yet Mon-El neither complained nor moved away. He liked it. He liked everything about it. The peace and comfort of the silence, of holding the women he loved, of knowing that he was loved back, and this amazing woman somehow believed in him after everything he’d done. He’d told her that her belief in him meant a lot. That was true, but it was also a huge understatement. Mon-El doubted he’d be where he was now if it wasn’t for that belief.

“I’ve never felt like I belonged on Earth,” Kara started after a couple of minutes of silence. Mon-El frowned as she started drawing circles on his chest with her fingers, lightly tracing the lines of his muscles.

“Really?” he inquired. “You seemed like—“

“—I’d gotten used to all of it?” Kara finished his sentence. “I had to, if I wanted to live among humans. If I wanted to have a normal life. Aliens weren’t always accepted. Actually they weren’t until around last year. I couldn’t out myself.” Her hand stopped as she took a deep breath. “So I created an identity for myself. Kara Danvers. Yet… Yet I still felt different. I would be with Winn, and we’d be drinking, and I had to pretend like I was getting tipsy when it wasn’t affecting me at all. I would hit my foot to the corner of a table and pretend like I’d gotten hurt. And you have no idea how many times I pretended like I didn’t hear a conversation happening way too far away from me for a human to hear. They’re little things, I know, but they were constant reminders that I was an alien, that I didn’t belong to Earth, and wouldn’t no matter how much I tried.” She snuggled up to Mon-El even more, throwing one leg over his.

“I thought you liked being Kara Danvers.” Kara chuckled slightly.

“I do. But it’s not who I truly am. And last year, when I first started using my powers for good, started being Supergirl, I thought it’d change. I thought if I used my powers, if at least in one part of my life I didn’t have to hold them back or pretend they didn’t exist… I thought I could feel more normal. But… But it was just another mask. A mask that allowed me to be free for at least a couple of hours, but a mask nonetheless. And it made me believe that… That I would never feel normal, not truly. I would never have the life I left back on Krypton. Using my powers just made me realize that not feeling normal wasn’t just about having powers, it was about… About having no one from my old life. No one to talk to about Krypton and knowing they understood the references I made. No one to make a joke about this and that that used to happen on Krypton without having to explain it. No one to talk about how life was there, and how despite all of its flaws it was still my home planet, and a part of me would belong there.” She lifted her head to look at Mon-El’s eyes. “Until you came along.”

“Me?” Kara nodded with a genuine smile.

“Yeah. You have… You have no idea how good it feels to be able to talk to someone that is familiar with my old life. I can be Kara Zor-El with you; I don’t have that with anyone else.”

Mon-El’s heart skipped a beat as he registered her words. Of course, those were so similar to how he felt when he first came, yet Kara… She seemed so ingrained with the Earth’s culture that Mon-El had no idea all those things actually bothered her. Yet it should’ve been obvious; her eyes lit up whenever she talked about Krypton, or Mon-El mentioned something about it. She always flashed him a smile, as if they had an _inside joke_. That was what Winn told it looked like when they talked about Krypton, Daxam, or other planets. _I hate it when you talk about intergalactic stuff_ , he’d huffed. _You all go smiley-smiley when us poor earthlings don’t understand anything_.

“I don’t feel lonely when I’m with you either,” Mon El confessed, his hand caressing Kara’s waist over the blanket. “So I… I wanna thank you. For everything you did for me.”

“No problem at all,” Kara answered with a twinkle of joy in her eyes. She’d nestled on his chest again, not even attempting to get up. Not that Mon-El wanted to get up, but…

“Um, Kara?” he asked.

“Hmm?”

“Don’t you have to go to work today?”

“Uh-uh,” came Kara’s quick answered. Mon-El couldn’t see her smile, but he could feel it. “I took a day off for today.”

Well, that explained Kara’s total lack of attention to time. A grin cracked on Mon-El’s face.

“Does that mean we don’t have to leave the bed for the whole day?”

“Uh-huh,” Kara said, looking up. “At least not until you have to go to work. Mon-El chuckled with a nod.

“I think I can deal with that,” he said as he leaned forward, pressing her lips on Kara. Thought as she pushed him on his back and got on top of him, with her hair falling down like a curtain of gold, he wasn’t so sure about what he said. Because this, here, right now… This was where he wanted to stay for the rest of his life. After losing Daxam, this was the closest he felt to belonging somewhere, to a place being a home.

Not even closest, though. This _was_ home.


End file.
